I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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