i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
