I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
