Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
from now on my penis is your penis
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
