Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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