It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
