she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
