I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
