: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize