i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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