I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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