We're like a lot better than the average bears
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
