no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
