oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
