I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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