Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
