the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
