Having a random hookup so left but love u
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
