i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
