god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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