omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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