i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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