brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
