Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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