did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
