It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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