Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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