I hate your face
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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