she takes plan B like it's going out of style
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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