Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
