He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
