So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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