somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
