I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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