i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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