Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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