Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
did i walk over a car last night?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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