I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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