The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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