didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
