so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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