I smell stomach acid.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
