i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
