the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
they're like a gay fantastic four
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Randomize
