Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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