Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
