Those balls look pretty dangerous.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
