That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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