I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
