I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize
